This is the pre-holiday issue of LeMonAide.  Since there are almost 10,000 of you reading this monthly journal, it is impossible to send you a card with an enclosed photo of the growing LeMon family (three, and one on the way, grandsons).  So, here is my greeting prayer for you and those close to you this holiday season:  I pray you will discover Someone larger than you who will lead you into personal peace and extravagant success…learning how to live.

You just discovered someone has been making decisions about your professional future …and chose to keep these clandestine plans from you.

How do you respond?

First, if the person tossing the die against the wall of your tomorrows has positional power and obviously did not intend you to have a voice in this discussion, here are three, non-productive choices.

You could throw a “double hissy” in front of your coworkers (that always makes you feel better for about three or four nanoseconds) and once the screaming has stopped you may want to walk quickly to HR to pick up your last paycheck.

You could also pick the eternal “stare and sulk” methodology which will always make you a contender for the Academy Awards of Victimization.

The final choice is obvious.  You could beat the hangman to the gallows and pull the trapdoor lever by just calling in your resignation at 3 a.m. to the Employee Help Line.

Second, and highly recommended, you can pursue these sequential steps.

Step One—When you discover your future is being surreptitiously molded by foreign hands, confront.

Your script for this conversation could read, “I understand my professional future with our organization is under discussion.  Am I correct? “

Be prepared for your boss to try to “triangulate” the conversation by asking, “Who told you that?”

Indirectly refuse to answer the question with this retort, “My professional future, as you will certainly agree, is my responsibility.  Therefore, I need to know if there is any truth to my assumption that my professional future is under consideration by you or others.”

Notice in Step One you are pursuing a non-confrontational confrontation.  

Step Two—Your boss may say, “I don’t know what you are talking about.  No one in management is discussing your tenure.”

The statement above is a divine gift because now you can respond, “If I am wrong about my assumption then I assume you can now tell me the quality and quantity of my work has your wholehearted endorsement.”

Listen carefully to the tone and words you hear next.  If there is any equivocation, any hesitancy or hiccup in your boss’ voice, follow up with, “I sense you did not give my work a ringing endorsement.  Tell me, am I right or wrong?”

Step Three—If you hit a stalemate, thank the person for listening to you with, “I realize we do not agree on information and impressions.  What I hope the two of us can agree on is the need for transparency in our dealings with each other.  I will continue to proactively represent myself and I know you will do the same.  Thank you for your time today.”

So, what did you gain?  Even if your boss did not give you a full “confession,” you communicated your need to be consulted when your professional future is on the block.  

I read this book in preparation for a keynote address.

My client was an association of philanthropic organizations and I would be the first voice they heard in this conference.  When I asked, “What are people who would be sitting in front of me reading right now?” the immediate response was Forces for Good:  The Six Practices of High-Impact Nonprofits by Crutchfield and Grant (ISBN:  13:  978-0-7879-8612-4).  

You are probably asking right now, “Why would I want to read a book about nonprofits when we are looking at our bottom line?”  Well, nonprofits look at the bottom line just like you only they change the paradigm by succeeding when asking for money instead of accumulating it.

Look at these six practices of the high-impact nonprofits:  (1) advocate and serve, (2) make markets work, (3) inspire evangelists, (4) nurture networks, (5) master the art of adaptation and (6) share leadership.

When I started to understand these practices I thought of my own company.  These initiatives were all valid for Executive Enrichment, Inc.

After you have overdosed on the 23 Disciplines of Success from the latest financial guru, you may want to pick through this book and unearth its refreshing approach to growing a highly successful organization.

Article for Free Download

I have just completed a new article perfectly timed for this season of the year.  It is entitled, “Four Gifts You Can Give Yourself in the New Year.”  Interested?  Go to www.execenrichment.com and choose the Downloadable Resources option.  After filling out a brief form, you’ll have access to the article.

You have taken a client or business associate out for lunch.  You will be paying the bill.  How do you handle the etiquette of ordering?

First, spend time just getting acquainted or relaxed before ordering.  When you are presented with the menu let your server know you would like a certain amount of time (“Give us fifteen minutes”) and inquire about the “specials” of the day.

It is important not to become absorbed with the offerings on the menu during this time.  You may want to ask your guest if he/she has been to this particular restaurant and the evaluation of both quality of food and service.

Second, put your guest at ease by suggesting what you will be ordering when the server returns.  This will establish the price point for the other person.

Third, when the server arrives, ask your guest to order first.  Follow up with your order and then signal the server throughout the meal when the needs of your guest become apparent (more water, bread or change of silverware).

Fourth, if there is a problem with either the food or the service, do not deal with the server.  Ask your server who is the “manager on duty” and excuse yourself to address the quality issue with this decision-maker.  This conversation should be physically removed from your table.  Trying to impress your guest with your ability to do episodic problem-solving may lose you the business.  

Finally, when the two of you have finished your meal, take just a few minutes to summarize the business agreements you have cemented during this meal.  Remember, the meal should be a relaxed environment for the two of you to accomplish two things:  eat a meal together like two friends and accomplish business like two professionals.

I can save a lot of time (and anxiety) by making sure I am not “burning the midnight oil” (a.k.a. working right up to the deadline) by following this methodology.

First, I remind myself I work faster, not better, when I keep procrastinating.  I do not, neither do any of us, produce our best work if the final incentive is to keep repeating, “get in gear, the clock is ticking.”  Fear is not a good environment for excellence.

Second, I put a “plan” on paper listing my sequential deadlines.  For me this plan is a sheet of notebook paper for each major project I need to complete.  My physical calendar is also open at this time.  I will then write down the dates I will complete a specific part of the overall project.

Finally, when the project is complete and edited, I celebrate.  Depending on the scope of the project I will put my feet up with a cup of decaf hazelnut coffee, leave the office early, go home and work on another handyman project, take my kayak out for an hour or go to Europe for three weeks.  You get the picture.

Time can be the enemy or your best friend.  You have to control the clock instead of allowing yourself to be controlled by those diabolical moving hands.

If you are going to spend time in your car over the holidays, here are some of my favorite ways to make the miles go by quickly and safely.

First, when you fill up your car with fuel, always check your tire pressure.  An easy way to monitor your tire pressure is to buy the visual tire pressure indicators.  Go to any automobile parts store and look for tire pressure gauges that screw right on to the tire stem.  On the end of the tire gauge will be a green indicator.  These gauges come in 32, 36 and 40 psi.  When the green indicator moves out of your view it is time to fill up that tire with air.  

Second, take your own food and snacks.  If you do not have time to go into a restaurant and choose from a menu you will use the tried and proven (to clog your arteries) drive-thru munch-n-go meal.  I take a thermos of coffee, fruit and a sandwich I create out of healthy choices.

Third, you may need some entertainment.  I made an investment in satellite radio and have not been disappointed.  With over 140 channels to choose from, I normally can find something to keep me entertained or informed.  Then there are times when silence is the safer and saner choice.

Finally, especially at this time of the year, never take a trip without your cell phone, a working flashlight, a set of jumper cables, a snow shovel, a blanket, plastic tire chains and a first aid kit.  I know all this paraphernalia sounds like “overkill” but the last thing you want is to work at survival in the winter.

I have just recorded a new MP3 file for you to download entitled, “Skills to Ask for What You Need at Work.”  If you are a competent person who wants to provide productivity to your workplace but someone with position power does not want to get you the resources you need, download this ten minute presentation.  I will give you eight, sequential steps to verbally convince your boss what you need is what will make your organization a success.

To listen to the MP3 file, go to www.execenrichment.com and choose the Downloadable Resources option.   After filling out a brief form, you’ll see the Podcasts icon.

Here are four questions which should be part of any sales conversation.  I will give you the question and then explain why this interrogatory is so important.

Question #1, What company is your most serious competition?  The answer to this question will give you an insight into the competitive environment this potential client is fighting to control.  If you know what they fear, you can design the product which will produce the peace.

Question #2, What distinguishes you from your competition?  This question will inform you about the internal efforts this company is making to protect its economic turf.  You will not mock or question their efforts; your product or services will enhance what they are presently doing.

Question #3, What are you internally doing to equip your staff to deal with this increasingly difficult market?  Notice the word “equip.”  Whatever your product or services, equipping your customers will always be your focus.  How can you “assist” in the equipping process?

Question #4, If we were your main vendor for the skills/product you presently need to succeed, what would be the first deliverable you would be expecting from us?  No need to explain, right?  The answer to that question creates the focus for what you would deliver after the contract is signed.

Let’s conclude this month’s LeMonAide with a review of the correct formatting for a letter.

Do you remember a letter?  That’s right, US Postal Service, stamps, licking, etc.  Well, letters are still being written and sent out so here are the significant format issues as defined by the Tenth Edition of the Gregg Reference Manual.

The date line: appears either at the left margin or the center of the text which will be determined by where the signature appears.  The date line must be in alignment with the printed signature.  The date should always be written out:  December 1, 2009.

The inside address:  appears at the left margin and includes the name of the person to whom you are writing and his/her full business address.

The salutation:  it is an accepted rule to use the title of the person for earned degrees (Dr., Drs., Rev.).  This title is spelled out if “the” appears in front of the salutation.

The body of the letter:  either the block style or the modified block can be used for formatting the content of the letter.  In the block style, justification takes place at the left margin and there is no indentation for paragraph divisions.  If the modified block style is used, indentation of five spaces is normally used at the beginning of each paragraph.

Complimentary Close:  with the block style the complimentary close can be eliminated.  When using the modified block style the writer normally will use “Sincerely.”

Signature:  one of the distinguishing marks of a letter over electronic correspondence is a physical signature which should be written just above the signature block which normally includes the writers name and title within the organization.